Thursday, January 23, 2014

Glasses Are Not The End Of The World

Life is slightly annoying.

Ever noticed that?  Life is annoying.  I'm sure everybody, one way or another, has faced life's annoyances before.

When I say life's annoyances, I mean events that seem kindasortamaybe majorly bad at the time, but in the grand scheme of things, they aren't.

For example, minor annoyance number one: finals.  They're major.  I'm in freshman year.  High school semester grades actually count.  I mean, colleges are going to look at them and decide if they want me!

But first semester of freshman year?  Haha, they're important, but not that important.  Considering the three day of finals out of the thousands that I'm hoping to live, it doesn't matter too much.  It carries weight, but it's not the final word in my future.

It's a good idea to keep perspective.

Finals are looming over me like a dark threatening cloud, however.  I've been busy, typing up study guides and staring my eyes off at the white pages in front of me, hoping that I'll remember everything on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. 

Which brings us to minor annoyance number two

Other kids see that I've typed everything up.  Then they ask for the study guide.

Of course, the ball is in my hand.  I can share the pages that I've spent a couple of hours of my own time typing up, or I can keep them to myself.  It seems to be selfish to keep the pages to myself, which is what I've been doing.  But, if you think about it hard enough, it starts to seem slightly less selfish.  So I've been convincing myself that I've been doing the right thing by thinking this:

1) Finals is coming up.
2) We're all frantically studying.
3) I'm responsible for my studying.
4) So, as person in responsible for my studying, I am going to type myself a little study guide, for convenience's sake.
5) They are responsible for their studying.
6) I am not responsible for their studying.
7) They ask me for the study guide.
8) Again, I am not responsible for their studying.
9) I do not have to give them the study guide if I do not want to.
10) They can type up their own study guide.

Is that selfish?  WWJD?
It's a messed up world.  Why do I always feel so bad when I say no to their inquiries, when I feel like I've justified myself in saying no?  And if I do give them the study guide--it's not exactly fair that I've just spent some of my own, personal, private time typing this up, and they get it without working for it.  

Or maybe I can meet them partly.  I can give them some of the study guide, just for friendship's sake, but not all of the thing, because then that would for them, and for me.

Saying no is hard.  So usually, I don't say the word outright.  I go, UGGGGHHH... and GLUGGGHHHH... and turn my head in a way that implies no.

Freshmen troubles.  *sigh*

Speaking of freshmen, I've been having minor annoyance number three in my Careers class.

It's nothing major, of course--that's why it's called "minor."  But it's major enough to be annoying.

There are several events corresponding to this minor annoyance, so let me outline them for you.

1) There are 8-9 girls in the entire, forty-kid class.
2) I am not sitting by any of those girls.
3) I am sitting by a couple of boys.  The person in front of me apparently takes great pleasure in turning around and staring at me.  (I believe he's just trying to get me to react.  I concentrate on the Angels posters that decorate the room, and so was reminded of Vladimir Gurrero and the Angels' good ol' days.  Man!  I wonder where he is :).  
4) Since it's Careers class, we went through the mock stages of job interviews.  My teacher chose five people randomly; out of those five people, two were girls and three were boys.
5) After the first round of interviews, two boys ended up advancing to second-round interviews.
6) After the boys' second mock interviews, every student voted for one of the two boys to get the job.
7) I voted, along with every normal person in the classroom, for one of the boys.
8) We had to score the boys' interviews on our tally sheets.
9) I crumpled mine up in a ball and threw it into a trash can.
10) The people in front of me decided that it would be fun to see which person I voted for, and, consequently and apparently, which person I "liked."  (Need I point out that there were only two choices, and both of them were boys--so I had to vote for a boy either way?  It was a lose-lose situation for me.)
11) The guy in front of me got out of his seat and proceeded to take a ball of paper out of the trash can, uncrumple it, and look at the results.
12) It wasn't mine. (Thank goodness)
13) He proceeded to repeat the process several times.
14) I had had the unlucky graces of putting my name on my tally sheet.
15) He uncrumpled it and read the "winner" out loud.
16) I have the undeniable joys of being teased for voting for the better interviewee.

Whoop-dee-doo.  Yaaay, high school.  

It's annoying.  I try to pretend to be busy so they don't have an excuse to talk to me.  (My idea of "busyness" is taking a sheet of paper out and doodling all over it.  I make sure to look extra focused, too.  Like I'm going to be a professional doodler.  And my doodles actually look pretty decent.  For doodles).  After the first semester of Careers, we're going to switch over to Health.  Apparently, the Health teacher is a Christian (he wrote a devotional, according to our school newspaper) and he's a pretty cool person.  

Bam!  Can't wait to get to Health, even though the subject's going to be on the interesante side.

Health is apparently very fun.  However, being the opposite of the epitome of health is not.  (Go back and reread that sentence).

Which brings us to

Minor annoyance number four: Glasses.

I'm wearing them as I type.  My right eye apparently decided to glitch, and so now it has the red-streak-thing going on, and when I tried to put my contacts in today, it got irritated and teary and all that good stuff.

Hence the glasses.

It's actually kind of a blessing in disguise, because now I don't care as much about how I look with glasses on at school.  It's like, who cares?  It's high school.  It's not the rest of my life.  When I first wore glasses to HS, I kept on taking them off.  Now, I'm like, Whatever.  They're glasses.  

At least they're not, like, permanent.  (I hope).  And it'll be fun, deciding whether or not to give my eyes a break, without being held captive by the ideas my heart contrives.  According to my heart, I look better without the glasses on.  But according to the new voice that's sprung up in my brain, the glasses add character to my flat facial features (haha) and besides, they're kind of cool.  

The minor annoyances of life.  They aren't everything in life.  Not by far.  Actually, the minor annoyances of life make life life.  

Finals?  They determine some of your future, but not the whole thing.  And it's God Who writes our stories--and ultimately, everything is in His hands.

Saying no?  It's hard, but it's not impossible.

The crush stuff that pepper every high schooler's mouth today?  Gargoyles, the stuff is garbage, and who cares about garbage?  I'm not going to spend time worrying over every little thing that happens to me in that area.

And glasses?  They aren't the end of the world.  

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