Monday, July 7, 2014

Worthless Fame

To be honest, that’s been my goal all along—with this blog, with my writing. Fame. I wanted it. 


But God taught me two things on my vacation to Korea:
-He doesn’t take vacations from teaching me things, even though I may go on vacation.
-I don’t need fame to be successful.

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To be honest, I’m envious of Sabrina Carpenter. Yeah, I’m jealous of a Disney Channel star. Why? Well, for starters, she’s on Girl Meets World, which is looking to be a pretty good show, judging from the awesomeness of the pilot episode. She has over 100,000 followers on Instagram. (Yeah, I’m one of those people. Or I used to be.) She’s pretty, she’s a good actress, and she’s an even better singer. (Think Tori Kelly’s style, not Miley Cyrus’.)
I don’t even know her personally, so I’m judging her in a way that makes me envy her talent, luck, and dedication.
But what do I know about her life? I’m just from a distance. I don’t know what fame is really like, and although I imagine it must be like heaven, I thought having Instagram was going to be like heaven and it isn’t.
As I was sitting in the church service in Korea, I was listening to the sermon. The pastor was preaching on faithfulness. And I don't know how it happened, but God showed me that faithfulness to His service is worth more than escalating fame like Sabrina Carpenter’s. I can’t bring fame, money, or status to heaven. And instead of getting the chin-up from God, I want Him to say, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”
I never used to get that when people said it. Now I do.
God taught me that fame isn’t the end goal. I’ve been struggling with that. Trying to be famous. Wanting to get a Twitter and Tweet out everything that I’m doing in a way that makes the mundane seem kool. Striving to make waves with my eensy-teensy blog.
I honestly don’t know how He did it, but I think He changed my heart. He made me realize that this life is nothing in comparison to His eternity.
Fame dissipates quickly. It becomes an addiction stronger than heroin. People have a taste of fame and get hooked. They keep wanting more and more of it, because that’s the way the human nature is—the more you have, the more you need. The law of decreasing return. 
So I guess you could say my life has a new purpose now. Instead of blogging for the sake of pageviews, I’m writing for the practice, the joy, the definition of it. If I ever become famous, I want it to be on my terms, and not because I compromised and strove to become that way.
If it’s God’s will to make me famous, so be it. If it’s not, then so be it. My writing voice is not my own, and if I do become well-known, I want to glorify God with everything I do.
So, for now, I’m lying low. I’m going to blog and leave the stats—and worrying about the future—up to God. 
I’m also going to prepare. Whether I become renowned or not, life is going to throw its obstacles at me. 
So, how am I going to prepare?
I’ll be spending time with God, of course. Listening to a bit more Christian music, particularly Christian rap, because it’s the most insightful music there is and so far it’s taught me a lot. I’m going to be rereading Screwtape Letters, by C.S. Lewis, again—the first time around wasn’t fully comprehensive—and I’ll try Mere Christianity as well. My dad has a lot of books on theology and stuff, so I’ll tackle those.
Believe it or not, I actually find theology kind of interesting. So even if I’m not going to be a pastor—the Bible says women were not made to be pastors—what’s stopping me from reading like one?
So, anyway, fame. It’s fickle. And even though being a Disney Channel star would be fun, I think it’d kind of restrict my life. I mean, all those screaming fangirls are enough to scare Indiana Jones. So I’m steering clear of that industry and looking to a higher power.



7 comments:

  1. Good for you, Rcubed! Keep following the Lord's leading; its the only way. :)

    HP

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    1. Thank you for the encouragement! :-)

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  2. “Better to write for yourself and have no public, than to write for the public and have no self." -Cyril Connolly

    Even though that quote isn't directly Christian, this post reminded me of it. You could switch out "yourself" with faith, and "public" with fame. Haha, that didn't even make any sense. Well, good job on this post! I would comment with my Google account except I have a Yahoo email, so...

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    1. Wow, thanks for the quote--it perfectly sums everything up. Thanks!

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  3. I'm so glad you were able to learn this, Rcubed! And thanks for being honest with us! Fame is a trap we're so easily sucked into, and I know what it means to be hooked on our stats. While I think it is good to pay attention to what readers like, that's never an excuse to compromise your vision and the purpose God has for your writing. Get close to Him and He'll show you where to go. :)

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